Why My Nightmares Stopped (And How Yours Can Too)

✨ Content is free—but crows like snacks.

“The nightmares didn’t stop when I got stronger.
They stopped when I got curious.”
🪶 Loui Crow

The Trick That Ended My PTSD Dreams After 10 Years

I used to have rape dreams.
Running-for-my-life dreams.
Teeth-clenched, body-frozen, please-wake-up-now dreams.

They weren’t just bad dreams—they were loops.
Like the trauma had a projector and a favorite reel.

Around 23, I started smoking weed for the pain.
PTSD. Depression. Aches in my body no one could explain.
And weed helped. But not just with pain.
It helped me forget my dreams.
That part was an unexpected relief.

For years, the dreams stopped.
Or maybe I stopped remembering.
Either way, it was quiet.

🌕 Nine Years Later — The Dreams Came Back

Then, at 33, I got pregnant.
I quit smoking.
And the dreams came back with a vengeance.

But this time, it wasn’t just me watching.

I’d heard somewhere that when you're pregnant, your baby can see your dreams.
Whether it’s true or not, that changed everything for me.

I didn’t want Truman inside that kind of fear.
That kind of history.

So I started learning how to shift it.

✨ The Night I Rewrote the Ending

I’d been hearing about lucid dreaming.
That if you realized you were dreaming, you could change it.

That intrigued me.
Gave me a little spark of hope.

Then one night, it happened.

I was having a rape dream—one of those same old patterns.
I woke up—shaken—and went to the bathroom.
But instead of trying to forget it, I told myself:

“I’m going back in.
But this time, I’m changing it.”

I laid back down.
And when the dream started again…
I knew it was a dream.

And in that moment—I turned the entire thing into a cartoon.

The figures changed. The fear dropped.
Everything got silly. Ridiculous.
The danger lost its grip.

The characters were still dark.
But suddenly I was watching them from outside the fear.
I was lucid. I wasn’t helpless anymore.

And I woke up… laughing.
Like I had just reclaimed something ancient.
Like I’d just won my own dream back.

🐚 That Was the Beginning

That was the last nightmare I ever had.

It’s been over two and a half years.
Not a single one since.

I didn’t wake up in shame.
I didn’t wake up in a scream.
I didn’t wake up checking the locks.

I woke up… curious.

And that changed everything.

🛏️ From Dread to Devotion

After that night, my entire relationship with dreams changed.

I started writing them down.
I kept a notebook under my pillow like a secret language was coming through.
I stopped being afraid of what they might show me.
I started listening.

I used to dread sleep.
Now I look forward to dreaming.

The healing wasn’t instant.
But it was real.
And it came when I finally let myself face the things I swore I could never look at.

No more running.
No more freezing.
No more hoping to forget.

Instead?

I learned to fly.

That’s when I realized:
Dreams aren’t just dreams.
They’re the rehearsal space for the soul.
And I get to direct the next act.

👁️‍🗨️ And If You’re Still Stuck…

If you’re still in the cycle—
Waking up sweating, shutting the blinds on your own mind—
I see you.

You’re not failing. You’re surviving.
And surviving is already sacred.

But hear me when I say this:

It can change.
Even the worst dreams.
Even the ones that feel wired into your body.
Even the ones you’ve had since you were small.

You don’t have to live your whole life bracing for sleep.

You can teach your dreams new rules.
You can shift the ending.
You can be the one who stays, who fights back,
who flies out the window.

It’s not just “possible.”
It’s already happening.

Every night you open your eyes to the dream world and don’t flinch?

That’s a new spell.
That’s a new timeline.
That’s a new you.

HOW TO BECOME AWAKE IN YOUR OWN DREAMS:
A bedtime spell for lucid weirdos and timeline travelers

Here’s the truth they don’t teach in school:
You’re dreaming right now.
The only difference is, this dream has rules.
But dreams? The ones at night? They glitch.

Reality checks are tiny rituals that teach your brain to notice the difference.
If you practice them during the day, they’ll sneak into your dreams.
And once they do? You get the remote.

🌀 Pinch your nose and try to breathe through it.
– Awake: no air.
– Dream: oh baby, you’re suddenly a snorkel.

💡 Flip a light switch.
– Awake: lights obey.
– Dream: nothing changes. Or worse, flickers like a haunted film reel.

👁 Push your finger into your palm.
– Awake: solid.
– Dream: it slides through like butter. Welcome to body-horror Barbie.

🖐 Stare at your hands.
– Awake: fine.
– Dream: extra fingers. Melting fingers. Monster claws. You never know.

🪞 Find a mirror.
– Awake: reflection.
– Dream: distortion. Shadow selves. Or someone else entirely.

🚀 Jump and see if you fly.
– Awake: gravity.
– Dream: lift-off. Time to Hogwarts the hell outta here.

WHY IT MATTERS:
Every time you do one of these checks during waking life, you’re planting a seed.
The more you plant, the more likely it’ll sprout when you’re asleep.
That’s the portal moment. That’s when you realize:

🌙 Wait... I’m dreaming.
And then you get to choose.
Not just what happens next in the dream…
But who you are while it’s happening.

That’s dream alchemy.
That’s creative reimagining at its wildest.
That’s when healing happens with better lighting and flying lessons.

So start now.
Pick one or two reality checks and do them every day.
Ask, “Am I dreaming?” even when you’re sure you’re not.
Because someday, you’ll ask it—and the answer will be yes.

Then the fun begins.

You’re not broken.

You’re molting.
🪶